A Choice

In his talk Agency and Anger, Lynn G. Robbins discusses ways Satan uses anger to destroy family relationships, specifically by separating anger and agency. He said, "A cunning part of his strategy is to dissociate anger from agency, making us believe that we are victims of an emotion that we cannot control." He goes on to say the terms, "losing my temper" and "you made me mad" are words chosen to displace the responsibility of anger in the first place. It simply couldn't be one's fault if someone else provoked your anger or you lost your temper ' accidentally.' Instead Brother Robbins is clear; anger is a choice.

 

I know a woman that in her 90's now and this is still how she deals with her anger. She is consistently displacing it on someone else or not taking responsibility for her own words and actions. I don't understand how she couldn't see the wake it left behind her. Through the years she has damaged relationships with her children and siblings, along with plenty of mistrust from other relatives. She has lived a long life and allowed anger to be in the forefront of some important events and people, blaming them that they "made her angry." Satan waits for these actions and plants seeds of more anger to build and grow on top of one another. When left alone, anger can multiply and grow like a rampant weed.

 

David O. McKay said, “Let husband and wife never speak in loud tones to each other, ‘unless the house is on fire’ ” It takes incredible self-control to keep our anger in check. Daily, or multiple times a day, we must turn to God and ask for His help to turn away from anger. Brother Robbins closes his talk with these words, "Understanding the connection between agency and anger is the first step in eliminating it from our lives. We can choose not to become angry." Anger is a choice. We can bring peace and long suffering to our families when we turn away from Satan's attempts to 'stir up' the hearts of men.